Presence

Pixies & Purge

I am out in the back with the kids. They are playing with water and mud. Slippery and covered in childhood memories. The hot afternoon california Summer sun dancing on their faces with rays of youthful sparkles.    I am playing Pixies. The bluetooth speaker vibrating in the cup holder of my camp chair. “Hey! Been trying to meet you... Oooo ooo oooo ooo ooo…” Memories of cold nights on platform shoes, outside the clubs in Jerusalem of the 90’s.  [...]

Quarantine Queen

How are you feeling these days? Are you sinking into this time? Are you flowing with it? Rolling with the punches? Itching to spring out of it? Dreading what awaits on the other side?   I find myself NOT wanting to go back to “normal.”    Ever since quarantine began, I have been less stressed, less depressed, less on edge.   I feel guilty about it because so many people are suffering.   I miss my parents and my sister [...]

Corona Cocoon

From Quarantine Queen, Mindful Mother, Domestic Dame, Goofy Goddess, Mama Magic, to: “SHUT THE FUCK UP EVERYONE, AND LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!”   Waves. Cycles. Spirals.   Patient. Present. Strong. Stable. Fluid. Fun.   Bitchy. Broken. Sensitive. Stuck. Wavering. Wondering…   When I rock the covid (the new lifesty, not the virus), I feel grounded and giving - a source of support. A resource of steadiness. A sorceress - alchemizing the situation. Bending the boundaries to tend with tenderness [...]

Not Alone

You’re doing it all.  You’re never alone. Making sure they sleep enough and eat well and get some time outdoors and enough exercise, fresh air, and fresh ginger tea. You’re ordering organic veggies from farm fresh.  You try to avoid the supermarket, but every week there are a few things you really need, so you brave it, and you go.  You’re cooking so many meals a day, your hands feel numb. You’re weeding the little piece of earth you can’t [...]

Corona School

Last week was harder.    By Thursday I woke up in the morning and I was a mean mommy.     I really tried not to be.    During the night and into the early morning Shefa wasn’t letting me sleep. He woke up so early and used his special rooster voice. That voice he likes to use on those really early mornings when I am especially exhausted.    Some mornings, even if he’s waaaaay too early to be awake, he [...]

Post Equilibrium – Contemplations For Unsteady Times

Twice a year we get to experience the balance between day and night, darkness and light. Equinox is a moment in time that offers a glimpse into equilibrium. Many people treat balance as a goal. #balance #lifegoal But let’s face it -  balance only exists here and there for a split second, and then it tips over towards more of one thing, and less of another.    Equilibrium is a state in which polar energies are balanced. It offers the [...]

Today, On COVID-19

This morning the kids were fighting during yoga. Kesem was really upset because Shefa wasn’t practicing with us. She cried and yelled. He wanted to do his own thing and she couldn’t accept it.   They played beautifully later. She read to him. And they built things. They made art. They hugged a lot.    We still have lots of food. Although I’m starting to feel Anxious about what’s coming next. Will the stores stay open? The box of vegetables [...]

Weeds

She’s sitting on the bench by the dinning table, hair a little messy, lots of missing teeth, a crazy wide spread of artist markers - a hundred and twenty colors and shades, to be exact. She’s working on an elephant. Fifteen shades of gray. Muse-struck.    “Mama?” her eyes are focused on the curving lines of her elephant trunk.   “Yes, my love.”   “I have all these bad thoughts in my head.” The trunk she’s working on is playfully [...]

Cosmic Love

Whether he dances in the forest of my heart, howls in the dark nights of my soul, meditates on mountain tops inside my head, retreats to his cave, takes the seat of the teacher, or roams the cremation grounds of my life’s deaths, Siva is by far my favorite masculine deity.    (not a gender thing, but rather a code, an energy, a coalition of qualities)    I am a sucker for metaphor. Myths and archetypes help me understand myself [...]

Stir It Up – Imbolc Contemplation

It’s time to stir things up.    Earth is spinning and this northern half of the planet is beginning to receive more light. It grows slowly, not rushing in with bells on. It’s just slowly gaining momentum. With it comes hope. Once upon a time when we lived more attuned to the cycles of the planet, sunlight was  life force. We’re halfway through Winter, and halfway towards Spring. The sun is getting stronger. With it the earth regenerates life as [...]

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