Motherhood

Today, On COVID-19

This morning the kids were fighting during yoga. Kesem was really upset because Shefa wasn’t practicing with us. She cried and yelled. He wanted to do his own thing and she couldn’t accept it.   They played beautifully later. She read to him. And they built things. They made art. They hugged a lot.    We still have lots of food. Although I’m starting to feel Anxious about what’s coming next. Will the stores stay open? The box of vegetables [...]

It’s All About YOU

My Mom thinks that covid-19 came here for her. Like the angel of death showing up at your doorstep - “It’s time to come with me.” He whispers from within his dark cloak. Not a hint of a smile, she continues and explains how this virus affirms all of HER anxiety. SHE has always known her biggest fears were going to come true. This global crisis is happening to HER. Glued to the TV, she hasn’t really left the house [...]

Reformation In Isolation

It was hard to get out of bed this morning. Dark and cold outside. I wanted to get up before everyone else, so that I can have a moment for myself to meditate, but it didn’t happen. So I meditated with the kids staring at me. They tried to be quiet, but most of the time they forgot about the quiet contract that they signed when they decided to sit on the couch in the living room while I meditated. [...]

Corona Connection

Slowing the fuck down. I am a much nicer mama when we’re not in a rush. No plans. No place we must get to. No certain time to do anything. I feel like I’m spirling gently through a different galaxy, light years away from here, someplace that isn’t quite a place. Maybe it once was. Maybe it will be. But for now, it is a space, with particles and possibilities. Suspendant. Uprooted. And more grounded than I have been in [...]

Weeds

She’s sitting on the bench by the dinning table, hair a little messy, lots of missing teeth, a crazy wide spread of artist markers - a hundred and twenty colors and shades, to be exact. She’s working on an elephant. Fifteen shades of gray. Muse-struck.    “Mama?” her eyes are focused on the curving lines of her elephant trunk.   “Yes, my love.”   “I have all these bad thoughts in my head.” The trunk she’s working on is playfully [...]

Cosmic Love

Whether he dances in the forest of my heart, howls in the dark nights of my soul, meditates on mountain tops inside my head, retreats to his cave, takes the seat of the teacher, or roams the cremation grounds of my life’s deaths, Siva is by far my favorite masculine deity.    (not a gender thing, but rather a code, an energy, a coalition of qualities)    I am a sucker for metaphor. Myths and archetypes help me understand myself [...]

Boost Up Your Intentions

Sunset on the beach on the last day of 2019 seemed like the perfect thing to do. We were all sick during the first week of Winter Break, so a little bit of sunshine, a breath of fresh air, and the sound of waves crashing was a big yes! Great idea!    I was feeling hopeful. Excited. I still had more envisioning and planning and intention setting to do. But I was feeling open and clear and ready to expand.  [...]

Where Whole Becomes Holy

As the light dims, and the hours of darkness expand, the temperature lowers, and the desire to spend less time outdoors increases, we are moved by nature’s guidance indoors and inwards.   The rhythm of this season is slower. It inspires contemplation. It invokes meditation. It ignites the fire in the cave of our dreams. The spirit of the season guides us into a space of less doing, and more being, where we can enliven our creativity by releasing and [...]

When Epic Turns Subtle

I used to practice a few hours a day. Every day. Deep backbends. Arm-balances galore. Most of my day was spent upside down. Hip openers and forward bends took me into the eye of the storm that was me. I’d get high on oxygen with all that pranayama. I’d drive around town and take multiple classes a day with amazing teachers. I drank in the yoga, not in goblets, but in buckets. It was profound.     Sometimes I’d get a [...]

Death & Decay

It’s that time of year again - the peak of Fall, tipping over the midpoint between Fall Equinox and Winter Solstice. Darkness is gaining momentum. The days are getting shorter and shorter, faster and faster. Nights are growing longer. Death and Decay spread wide through the natural world now.    We are being pulled down. Guided to be lost beneath the surface of the earth, beneath the surface of our lives. Down and deep and in to the underworld. To [...]

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